How to Stand Down Anxiety and Reclaim Calm

If anxiety is your brain’s way of trying to protect you, how do you let it know you’re actually safe? You can’t reason with anxiety. You can’t logic it into disappearing. That’s because it’s not coming from the thinking part of your brain — it’s coming from the part that’s wired for survival. The part that speaks in body language, not words.

So, to soothe anxiety, we need to go through the body. Here’s a few suggestions of how to do it:

1. Move it through

When your fight or flight system is triggered, your body releases stress hormones like adrenaline and cortisol. If you don’t move (because let’s be real — we’re not exactly sprinting from wild animals these days), those chemicals stay stuck.

Try: A brisk walk, shaking out your limbs, dancing in the kitchen, or a few rounds of bodyweight squats. No need for a gym — just move.

2. Ground your senses

Your nervous system calms down when it receives messages of safety through your five senses.

Try:

• A warm bath or shower

• Soft textures (a blanket, a baby wrap, your favourite jumper)

• Calming scents (lavender, chamomile, or the smell of your baby’s head)

• Music that soothes or uplifts you

• Holding something cold or warm in your hands to bring you back to the present

3. Slow the breath

Fast, shallow breathing tells your brain you’re in danger. Slow, deep breathing says, “We’re okay now.”

Try:
Inhale for 4… hold for 4… exhale for 6. Repeat a few times. Let the exhale be longer than the inhale — it’s a shortcut to calm.

4. Name it with kindness

Sometimes just saying, “Ah, this is anxiety. My brain is trying to protect me,” can soften the grip that it has on you. It shifts you from inside the storm to observing it from outside.

Try: Talking gently to yourself like you would to a dear friend. “This is hard. I’m allowed to feel this. And it will pass.”

5. Reach out

Anxiety wants you to isolate. But connection is medicine.

Try: A voice note to someone who gets it. A chat with your doula. Or joining a community where your feelings are not only allowed — they’re understood.

You don’t need to be fearless. You just need to feel safe enough.
And safety starts with knowing you’re not alone in this.

You’re doing beautifully. And your nervous system can learn to rest again. It takes one step to start shifting anxiety, I know you can do it.

With lots of love and a little magic,

Elizabeth x